Heroine?: Should women pursue men?

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“She is free in her wildness, she is a wanderess, a drop of free water. She knows nothing of borders and cares nothing for rules or customs” ― Roman Payne

I’ve noticed a trend in modern movies and television. A few weeks ago, I was watching a TV show called Once Upon A Time. It’s a show about Disney characters that have been imported into our world and live in a town called Storybrooke. In the season 4 finale, the main character, Emma, convinces Regina to go after her soulmate who is now with someone else:

Emma: Your happiness is still a possibility; your first step is going after the man you love.

Regina: My happy ending isn’t a man.

Emma: Of course not, but love is a part of all happiness and you have to be open to that. Go to him, all you have to do is tell him how you feel.

Regina: Oh is that all? You forgot to mention the part where I’d have to crash his wedding!

Emma: What does your heart tell you?

Regina: I know what my heart says, but what if his doesn’t say the same thing?

Emma: Isn’t that a risk you’re willing to take?

I thought that was kind of interesting: females encouraging other females to be emotionally vulnerable and courageous in romantic pursuit of their inamorato (male lover). Then I thought about it, and nowadays, this is totally normal. In fact, I dare say this is the expectation. There is a new dating app called Bumble, which supports my theory.

Bumble matches you with compatible singles in your area. If you’re a match, it gives the woman 24 hours to make initial contact with the man otherwise the match disappears. However, a man can extend the deadline for another 24 hours, giving you a second chance to reach out to him.

I don’t know if this is necessarily “good” or “bad.” I like that I am free and able to initiate dialogue and connections. But on the other hand, I am much more comfortable being courted and pursued. When I would read fairy tales as a kid I remember the King would move heaven and earth to win a date or a dance with the Queen. And today, it is considered a “treat” when a man opens the door for a woman…

And so I wonder, are strong female initiators creating a new trend in love and romance? Are we, by initiating, eroding the standards we so desire? Do we desire to be courted and pursued? I’d love to hear your thoughts!

Made me laugh

What are your thoughts?

1 Comment on "Heroine?: Should women pursue men?"

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Genevieve
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THIS IS SO TRUE! Most of my girlfriends go after men as if it’s totally normal and expected. I’m not sure 75% of men even know HOW to court a woman. I’ve always wondered if this is a downside to feminism…

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